April 2012
themightynarwhal:
santorum wasn’t going to say “nigger” he was going to say “nuggies”
he’s not racist he’s just craving obama’s mcnuggies
snoopdeer:
gamer girl, vegetarian and satanist
lgbt friendly
cindry:
im not crying theres just anime in my eye
2 tags
a hilarious joke
tanku:
three cats are competing in a race. there’s an american cat named “one two three”, a german cat named “ein zwei drei”, and a french cat named “un deux trois”. the cats all swim across a lake. the american cat finishes first, the german cat finishes second, but the french cat is nowhere to be found.
why?
because the un deux trois quatre cinq
#but the german cat was the only one who...
i was in the grocery store reading product names aloud to myself in dramatic voices when i turned around and saw that there was someone standing right behind me
oops
Prediction:
For April Fool’s tomorrow a bunch of people will say they’re going to delete as a joke and none of their followers will respond and they’ll suddenly realize how little anyone cares and actually delete and it will really just be the best thing for everyone involved.
1 tag
liquidzoot:
sillyunicorntime:
so it turns out that the state penitentiary is right next to the local high school
and i mean right next
they are on opposite hills with just a stretch of grass and a road in between and the two buildings look eerily similar - the same color and architecture - only the high school doesn’t have any barbed wire
it’s like there was a meeting where the education...
i could probably run an entire blog based just on things my friend sara says and she’s coming over tonight so expect a lot of that
pizzaforpresident:
easybakemethlab:
pizzaforpresident:
sometimes i wrap a blanket around my arm and pretend it’s a gun
ur so weird
What did you say to me?!
1 tag
so it turns out that the state penitentiary is right next to the local high school
and i mean right next
they are on opposite hills with just a stretch of grass and a road in between and the two buildings look eerily similar - the same color and architecture - only the high school doesn’t have any barbed wire
it’s like there was a meeting where the education board sat down and said,...
March 2012
highb100d:
beellette:
dad just said “there should be a netflix for books”
five minutes later he shouted “THE LIBRARY”
um no
he didnt
gaymzee:
im not doing anything for april fools day because i think my existence itself is a funny enough joke
my mom wants me to clean the toilet before my friends come over wow the things i do for you guys
brrrwave:
Ok so I’m a huge fan of the Justin Bieber song Boyfriend, but today my friend pointed out while looking at the lyrics online that there’s a strange lyric in there (well all the lyrics are awful strange but this one in particular is fascinating)
Chillin by the fire
why we eatin’ fondue
now I’ve listened to the song a bunch to figure this out, and while it could go either way, I’m...
I found this advert on one of Elmify's videos
liamdryden:
robofillet:
I just had to try it out for myself
Yeah, I don’t need you, Shutterstock.
I tried but I just couldn’t make it
sassymcnasty:
if ur shirt doesnt have a fire pattern on it why are we even talking
1 tag
imthedad:
BYOB? Bring Your Own Beyblade
every teacher before they draw on the board: im not an artist
I was in the car earlier today and I realized that if I ever publish a book there’s no way I’m telling any of you about it because this blog would be a PR disaster.
The missionaries came by again today.
I told my mom we should hang a sign on the door that says, “Hail Satan. Don’t bother knocking.”
fuck i can hear my mom on the phone with my grandma downstairs and she’s telling her why i’m home
“nicole’s got some issues”
okay yup wow this is awkward
1 tag
queenofmultitasking:
absoluutebliss:
first of all, who allowed me on the internet
#the opening line of my biography
alwaysblind:
sometimes i just wanna climb up benedict cumberbatch and sit on his shoulders and cover his eyes so he runs around trying to get me off of him and then he runs into a wall or a pole and i calmly climb down and walk away
